Brokenness

"Here I am...at your feet...in my brokenness complete."

-Starfield

There's something wonderful about brokenness. Being broken usually gives us a negative connotation. We see in movies like Rocky IV, where Ivan Drago tells Rocky that "he will break him". You see in other arenas of life, men and women who have been broken, shattered into a million pieces of glass with no way to repair their fragile psyche. There are so many examples of brokenness in this world that lead to one thing...Despair. I believe that the brokenness that many people in the world experience does lead them to despair. It leads them to see that their lives are no longer manageable. It brings them to see that the hope that they once had in humanity, work, friends, or spouses ultimately is dissolved by repeated failures. Brokenness leads individuals into losing themselves and seeking to gain another for their identity, pride, character, and love. Brokenness as defined by the world leads to the awareness of chaos. I understand what it feels like to live in a brokenness where I see and taste despair. It is a fearful arena of death. It is filled with anger and pride. It leads me to idol worship and self-reliance. Yes, I have tasted this brokenness and I never desire to come back again. I never want to dive into the pit of death and dine on my sin anymore. No, this brokenness leads to only one thing...back into this world...back into myself.

So why am I writing about brokenness? There are two types of brokenness. The one mentioned above leads to death. The one unmentioned leads to life. Life. True Life. Life with joy. Life with God. I don't desire to ever stand at the edge of despair and jump into it's dark lakes. That's not the brokenness of one who has been saved by the blood of Jesus Christ. The brokenness of a man and woman whose life has been bought for a price on Calvary is a glorious awakening. It is realizing the innermost desperation for God and taking everything we are to the cross of Christ. This is a brokenness that as I hear death call my name, a louder voice penetrates the darkness and I hear another name...the name of redemption...the name is Jesus. It is that name that tears me away from death and sends me running towards grace. It is that name that leads me to forget my own name and envelops the frame of my soul. This is the brokenness that leads to life. The brokenness that leads to hope, not despair. The brokenness that shows my insufficiencies and points me to Christ. The brokenness that shows me that my identity does not lie in a shattered image of who I am, but points me to the wholeness found in Jesus Christ. I am not my own! I am not my own! I am not my own! This is where I want to be! Brokenness that leads us to Christ and away from ourselves is where I want to live. Come, let's run towards Christ and fall at His feet. He will pick us up and call us to live.